Consent Is Everything

#ConsentIsEverything

 Consent Is Everything

Video transcript

  • Consent Is Everything video transcript

    Animation courtesy of Emmeline May at rockstardinosaurpirateprincess.com (opens new window) and Blue Seat Studios (opens new window).

    Copyright© 2015 RockStarDinosaurPiratePrincess and Blue Seat Studios. Images are Copyright ©2015 Blue Seat Studios.

    If you’re still struggling with consent just imagine instead of initiating sex you’re making them a cup of tea.

    You say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they go “oh my god I would love a cup of tea. Thank you!” Then you know they want a cup of tea.

    If you say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they’re like “er you know I’m not really sure…” then you can make them a cup of tea, or not, but be aware that they might not drink it, and if they don’t drink it then – and this is the important bit – don’t make them drink it.

    Just because you made it doesn’t mean you are entitled to watch them drink it.

    And if they say “no thank you” then don’t make them tea. At all. Just don’t make them tea, don’t make them drink tea, don’t get annoyed at them for not wanting tea. They just don’t want tea, ok?

    They might say “yes please that’s kind of you” and then when the tea arrives they actually don’t want the tea at all. Sure, that’s kind of annoying as you’ve gone to all the effort of making the tea, but they remain under no obligation to drink the tea.

    They did want tea, now they don’t. Some people change their mind in the time it takes to boil that kettle, brew the tea and add the milk. And it’s ok for people to change their mind. And you are still not entitled to watch them drink it.

    And if they are unconscious, don’t make them tea. Unconscious people don’t want tea and they can’t answer the question “do you want tea” because they are unconscious.

    Ok, maybe they were conscious when you asked them if they wanted tea, and they said yes, but in the time it took you to boil that kettle, brew the tea and add the milk they are now unconscious.

    You should just put the tea down, make sure the unconscious person is safe, and this is the important part again, don’t make them drink the tea. They said “yes” then, sure, but unconscious people don’t want tea.

    If someone said “yes” to tea, started drinking it, and then passed out before they’d finished it, don’t keep on pouring it down their throat. Take the tea away. Make sure they are safe. Because unconscious people don’t want tea. Trust me on this.

    If someone said “yes” to tea around your house last Saturday, that doesn’t mean they want you to make them tea all the time. They don’t want you to come around to their place unexpectedly and make them tea and force them to drink it going “but you wanted tea last week”, or to wake up to find you pouring tea down their throat going “but you wanted tea last night.”

    If you can understand how completely ludicrous it is to force people to have tea when they don’t want tea, and you are able to understand when people don’t want tea, then how hard is it to understand when it comes to sex?

    Whether it’s tea or sex, Consent is Everything.

    And on that note, I am going to make myself a cup of tea.

    (ENDS)

    #Consentiseverything

    Together we can stop rape by ensuring everyone knows when they have sexual consent – and when they do not.

    Sex without consent is rape

    Rape happens to people of all genders and sexualities. About 92 percent of victims are female and eight percent male. Most rapes occur between people who know each other in some way.

Animation courtesy of Emmeline May at rockstardinosaurpirateprincess.com (opens new window) and Blue Seat Studios (opens new window).

Copyright© 2015 RockStarDinosaurPiratePrincess and Blue Seat Studios. Images are Copyright ©2015 Blue Seat Studios.

Thames Valley Police is working to raise awareness and understanding of sexual consent – what it means and how to get it.

The Force is working in partnership with Oxfordshire Sexual Abuse and Rape Crisis Centre, Rape Crisis Wycombe and Oxford University Students Union, as part of The Thames Valley Sexual Violence Prevention Group.

For more information click on the links on the right.

Support is available for those who have experienced sexual abuse and rape.

  • Oxfordshire Sexual Abuse and Rape Crisis Centre 0800 783 6294.
  • Rape Crisis (Wycombe, Chiltern and South Buckinghamshire) 01494 462 222.
  • Aylesbury Vale Rape Crisis 01296 392 468.
  • Trust House Reading 0118 958 4033.
  • Refuge 0800 221 8186.
  • Thames Valley Police 101. In an emergency dial 999.

Thames Valley Sexual Violence Prevention Group.

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Oxfordshire Sexual Abuse and Rape Crisis Centre logo

Rape Crisis logo

Oxford University Student Union logo